Low

Wait and pause
I want you to think about this
Let’s get this straight
By putting it down on a sheet

You know you don’t share same interests
Because you were bland and they were passionate

You tried hard
You couldn’t understand them
Your face turned colourless
You felt out of place

Unable to see
To see through you
They saw you self involved
And you knew you’d be avoided next

As much reluctant you were
You tried to fit in
You realized you weren’t yourself
But then you asked “Who were you again?”

You weren’t important anymore
You found yourself replaceable
After all, why not?
What interest did you offer?

You waited whole day
A call or a mere text
You knew partying wasn’t your thing
But guess what, you were social in your head

You knew them well
Well enough to not bother them
They thought you didn’t care
But maybe it was the other way

Being out there suddenly you learnt
Your life was a lie
That once you were intelligent

Truth was hard
You were dumb, you were slow
You lacked a sense
A sense so common

You were so collapsed
You wanted to disappear
You didn’t want to die, no, never
But not to live either

You stayed in your room
Living brave in your head
Blaming yourself
Questioning where you stand

You thought you could get vulnerable
Vulnerable to that special person
But how are they special
When your demons interfere

It’s dark in there
An amplifying mess
Amplifying to a point
That it blanks you out

You end up on a word
When you’ve got universe to say
You walk away brooding
Why are you the way you are?

Unable to bear the burden of thoughts
You close your eyes
Miraculously, you don’t have to force
The sleep gets on you automatically

They think you are lazy
You know you are lazy
You want to end this routine
But you realize you’ve lost your zest

Moon catches your eye
Rains resonate you
White noise soothes you
Landscapes fill you

You want to escape the reality
You want to dwell on a star
You find nights beautiful
You think you are better off alone!